I used to be a much more reactive person when it came to personal interactions that involved disagreements.

Somebody said something just slightly wrong to me, I went on full offensive. Sometimes I ended up on the losing end of the situation, most of the time I "won" by alienating people and/or looking like a jerk.

These days I'm much more mature and have learned how to gauge people's intentions and angles, which are, almost always different from mine.


Learn to discover what the other person is motivated by, what their purpose is for saying or doing something, as there is always a motive. With this knowledge, you'll be much better prepared to respond to, defend yourself against, defeat, or work with people.