I recently had someone ask me to help him with an issue he was having with his mother, who was pushing her own life ideas onto him. As much as my friend hated the ideas he was being fed, his mother was adamant about him doing what she suggested.

I told him that he needed to flip the situation in his mind and look at it from her perspective. As in, what exactly does your mother gain from you doing what she suggests? Is she looking to keep you close to her? Is she trying to protect you? Will she receive some financial benefit from it? You know your mother better than I do, I told him.  What is it that's driving her?


No word yet on what that is, but the point is that everyone has their core motives for every single action. No clear-thinking human being does anything without a motive. It may not be your preferred motive for doing that action, but there is a reason.