As a freshman in college, I had several run-ins with my basketball team head coach. We did not have the greatest relationship. Coach Maurice Williams once announced to the team, “some of you walk around this campus like you own it!” I knew he was talking about me. But he never said it directly to me.

As a sophomore in college, I had several disagreements with Coach Kenny Macklin. I spent more time on the bench than I should have, playing behind players who didn’t have half my skill level. Even though Macklin had recruited me, I was kind of happy to see him lose his job: it meant I could start a new with another coach as a junior.

As a junior in college, I had several run-ins with my head coach Armen Gilliam. Gilliam was not a very good coach, didn’t really know how to handle different people’s personalities, made very bad personnel decisions, was super egotistical, would have been great as a trainer, but had no idea how to coach college basketball. Makes sense from the guy who got kicked off the team, right?

Oh yeah – I got kicked off the team as a junior.

As a senior in college, I wasn’t even on a basketball team. I played intramural basketball. I did win a championship there, though.

There was a good, logical reason why I had run-ins with all three of my college head coaches: I did not have strong work habits.

Coaches did not know what to expect for me. Coaches could see that my effort level rarely matched my talent level. And now, as an adult, I can see how frustrating that can be for someone. Now, I never blame any of my coaches for my college basketball shortcomings. I was 100% responsible.

At some point, when we see obvious patterns of outcomes in our lives, we must realize we probably have a whole lot to do with them. It’s not always bad luck. It’s not always someone out to get you. It’s not always you being in the wrong place at the wrong time. And if it is any of those, guess who is the common denominator in them all?

YOU.